This Body Can is a new series I am doing on my blog. This series is meant as a fuck you to the fitness industry complex, social media, etc. that make us feel like we aren’t good enough. This series is me, and you, building a community of support. We are all good enough and we all matter. So be strong, be useful and enjoy the first guest post on my blog from my friend Stephanie:
I’m in my 30s and I still don’t love my body.
I know I’m supposed to, I know that wholeheartedly. But, I let the pictures of perfect women on Social Media affect this. I let TV, Movies, and general media affect this perception. I’ve fallen so far into the ‘skinny is beautiful’ movement, that I can’t see the way out.
Yet, I know the difference. I know how I am supposed to love my body. And to an extent I do. It takes little glimpses or really, pictures from others to see myself as others may see me. Since I’m so deluded by my lack of self love.
I don’t say this to put myself down at all. But rather to know that my self love is a continual process. Some have it mastered, some ignore it all together. I’m in the middle, just a gal trying to love every curve, every roll, every dimple AND appreciate the body I was given.
I want to show you a picture of the body I would love to attain again:
J says I look like I need to eat. I think I look great. I know I was fit, but I also know I was obsessed with working out and eating very limited amounts of food. But I cannot sit here and tell you that I don’t crave that body. I do. I think it looks great. But I also know my life now is different and I don’t want to dedicate that much time to my body. I like spending my time with J and L, that makes me happy.
Working out makes me happy too. I need balance, but I need to workout. I need to go to Midtown regularly, because it keeps me strong and I’ve cultivated a little family there. The crazies at 5:30AM! I also need to never let my first love, soccer, and I fall out of love. Playing once or twice a week is exactly what this body and soul needs, if I get to play more that’s just a bonus. I need to run. Well, I do it on occasion these days, but for the last few years it was a large part of my life. Slowly it has taken a back seat, but it is still an important facet of my life, just not as much anymore.
This body can do all of this.
And for that I am grateful. I am able to look at current pictures of myself and remind myself that I am a strong woman, on the field, in a race, or in the gym. I’m in my early, almost mid thirties, and my body is holding up. I run. I lift. I play soccer. I love my body, even if I still have a distorted view of it.
I know what it takes to get what I want, but that isn’t really a priority any more. So, I sit here loving that I can physically do whatever I want, but still crave a body that isn’t what I have. So, just as I train my muscles and my body, I need to train my mind to remember that, “This body can do a lot and deserves to be loved in whatever shape it currently is!”
This body does what I want it to, it just looks a little different than I want it to…